Tiring Days

Do you ever just, wish you could stop everything, for just a second, so you could catch your breathe from running your whole life? You want to be able to breath regularly for one single second, but you can't stop running, it'll catch up to you. The things you've done, the people you've hurt, the pain you subdue, the bad memories you only wish you could drown out. Instead, to feel the good moments, to remember what it was like when your mother held you, before the world fell apart and you lost everything, before your dad became a drunk and did things that will never leave your mind, before you could fall in love and feel the pain of the other person slowly falling out, before you lost your mind. There are a list of things you would do, but you can't, because you can't get that innocence back, back when your mind was a bleached white sheet, that hadn't yet been stained black with the ink of what you could never have wished for. Sometimes you just want to sleep and never awaken again, because even though your dreams are bad, the reality you face is much worse.